TWO BIG ANNOUNCEMENTS TODAY.
Let’s cut straight to it.
Because I am an impatient little bean.
I’m going on a brief blogging hiatus until next Tuesday.
. . .
Today is also my one month blogiversary!!!
How exciting, amiright???
So. You’re probably wondering, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO LEAVE, DEAR MANGO??? I CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT YOU!!!
I know. Which is exactly why I’ve compiled a list on how to survive while I am on a blogging hiatus. #yourewelcome
But for you overly curious mangoes:
This weekend, I am going out of town to attend a dance convention.
I’ve only attended two dance conventions before, and I’ve never danced with this company (organization? faculty? WHAT DO I CALL THEM???) before. I’m super excited! Of course, I’ll be quite sore, and I wasn’t in any of the pieces chosen to perform, but that’s okay! It’s the experience that counts.
(Plus my dance studio is REALLY not competitive, so yay.)
And now you’re probably all freaking out because WHAT NO, HOW COULD SHE LEAVE ME TO FEND FOR YOURSELF IN THIS DARK WORLD FULL OF EVIL CARROTS AND BROCCOLI??? (The nemeses of mangoes.)
I’M SORRY. I’ll be back with a post on Tuesday, February 28, though.
(And I expect a huge welcoming party full of mangoes and cookies & cream ice cream. AND DRIED CRANBERRIES. DON’T FORGET THE DRIED CRANBERRIES.)
1. Be stalkerish and scroll through old posts.
- I’m a fairly new blogger so I don’t have that many posts, but you can still look through them (and the comments) to remind yourself of those wonderful days while May was still here.
- And honestly, this is what I do even when someone is not on a blogging hiatus. What can I say, being stalkerish is one of my
- And it’s quite fun.
- I recommend it.
- Especially late at night when it’s all dark and scary. It makes the experience better.
- (P.S. This is my fourth post in five days, so make sure to check out all of them in my absence!)
2. Randomly comment on posts.
- I mean, it won’t be fun for me to come back to all these random comments (well, maybe a little), but 1) it keeps you busy (from dying, of course), and 2) it reminds you of when you used to comment on my blog all those days ago.
- THOSE LONG, LONG DAYS AGO.
- Nothing like some reminiscing.
3. (Kindly) Promote my blog.
- What??? You can’t blame a girl for trying.
- About a week ago, Mahriya and I were talking about the perils of being a blogger and having to promote your own blog.
- Well, the solution of that is to just HAVE OTHER PEOPLE PROMOTE IT. #genius
- All you have to do is post something and then mention MOI and MA BLOG (what’s French for blog???) and link stuff to stuff to stuff. It’s very easy, fun, and relaxing.
- It also reminds you of those great times where you used to fangirl over me and my amazing blog. Which keeps you from dying, of course.
- Well. I know you people. You’re just not very patient.
- But I do believe that you can wait just six days until my next post??? Or my amazing comments???
- (BTW I won’t be commenting on new posts from Friday afternoon to Sunday evening. And if the hotel has Wi-Fi (aka if my parents will let me have the Wi-Fi password and actually use the complimentary Wi-Fi), I’ll probably comment all weekend too.)
- When people go on hiatuses, I’m always like WHY YOUR POSTS ARE THE ONLY BRIGHT LIGHT OF MY DAYS (besides comments from you guys, of course). But when I think I can’t make it and I’ll die from no-post-inglitus, I actually make it through. With new posts. Which leads me to…
5. Read others’ blogs.
- Guyssss looook. I’m being a kind mango and telling you to get off my blog and go read other awesome people’s blogs instead of commanding you to stay on my blog FOREVER AND EVER(ly). See how selfless I’m being?
Help it hurts how do people do this all the time.
- But yeah. I know it’s quite surprising, but there are ACTUALLY other blogs out there that EXIST besides my OWN blog. Shocking.
- Oh yeah, and while you’re at it, go ahead and perform Survival Method #1 (which is being stalkerish, for all you goldfish people like Mahriya) on those blogs, because people appreciate stalkers.
- Or is that just me.
6. Write in a journal about how much you miss me and how you feel like you’ll suffocate and/or die since I’m gone.
- Journals help, people!
- Just write, “AGH HELP ME I’M DYING BECAUSE MY FAVORITEST BLOGGER EVER IS ON HIATUS AND SHE’S NOT POSTING ANYTHING AND HER POSTS ARE MY LIFE I LIVE FOR THOSE POSTS I DIE WITHOUT THOSE POSTS HELP” and your problems will be solved!
- Unless you’re a person who uses a computer as a journal. Then type it out.
- But then you’ll want to keep writing/typing, which will grow into a whole ranty ramble about how much you need me and miss me and wish I’d come back and that will just make you feel worse
- Well, you know what, publish that post on your blog. Then people will comment (and check out my blog; thank you for the promo) and then you can wail together.
- BOOM. Problem solved.
7. Don’t post a lot on your blog.
- Posts take a lot of blood, sweat, and tears. You’re already pouring blood and sweat and tears over my hiatus, so don’t pour even MORE blood, sweat, and tears by posting!
Also this will help with the amount of new posts I have to read and comment on when I come back.
- But really. It’s an honoring sort of thing. I don’t post, you don’t post! See how it works?
- Stop looking at me like that.
- I’m perfectly sane.
- I think.
8. Distract yourself with other things, like actually sleeping.
- We all know that you don’t get sleep because you’re too busy stalking my blog and waiting for the moment a new post gets published.
- WELL. Now’s the time to catch up on all that sleep!
- It’s also very convenient, because since you missed so much sleep, you can just sleep six days straight until I’m back. #yourewelcome
- Or you could do other productive things, like working on that novel of yours, or reading that book that’s been sitting in dust now for the (exactly one) month that I’ve started my blog.
- SEE. LOOK AT THE BENEFITS OF MY HIATUS. (No. Don’t. Cry. Wail. Sob. DON’T BE HAPPY.) You get to catch up on all the things you missed ever since you started reading my blog. It’s great. Happiness.
- (Can you tell I’m being sarcastic? IT’S NOT HAPPINESS. CRY. WAIL. SOB. DON’T BE HAPPY.)
9. And finally… Just don’t.
- Just don’t survive.
- Easy solution.
- I mean, it’s not a way of surviving, since you’re not surviving… But die right after you finish reading, liking, and commenting on this post (and taking the following survey), and then conveniently come back to life on Tuesday, right as a new post comes up!
- 100% guaranteed to work!
- Buy now for $50!
- No money back.
- (Bookish needs, guys, bookish needs.)
And now, onto the second part of my post: MY ONE MONTH BLOGIVERSARY!!!
Can you believe it? The weeks have gone by so quickly! At 6:13 PM on Sunday, January 22, 2017 (I THINK it was 6:13, but maybe later), I published my blog!
Actually, I accidentally published it, but having helped my friends build their blogs, I discovered that you will always “accidentally publish” it, when you first make your website. That would’ve been a whole lot LESS STRESSFUL if I had KNOWN that, but nooooo, of course I had to freak out and think, AGH NO IT’S ALREADY PUBLISHED AND I DIDN’T FINISH MY POST AND MY SIDEBAR AND MY PAGES AND GAAH EVERYONE’S GOING TO THINK I’M A LOSER.
Thanks a lot, WordPress.
Unfortunately, I will not be having a giveaway, because #cheap. Oh wait. That’s quite fortunate for me. CUZ I DON’T HAVE TO SPEND $$$. #winning
But seriously, though. THANK YOU ALL SO, SO MUCH! You guys are the bestest subjects a Mango Queen could ever ask for.
As of right now, my blog stats stand at:
- 15 posts (this post makes 16)
- 1,836 views
- 366 visitors
- 294 likes
- 733 comments
- 86 WordPress followers + 2 email followers
OH MY MANGOES. *cries happily* Thank you thank you thank you! I never expected that I would build my blog this fast. I’m so grateful for all you amazing mangoes and readers and followers and commenters! You have made my day many, many times, and just seeing how much my blog has grown because of you is making my day right now!
I have no way to show how thankful I am (because, again, #cheap). Instead, I’ll just give you virtual hugs. And mangoes. Of course.
And now, I ask you yet another favor. I love you guys so, so much, and want to make my blog better for you. With that, I leave you the survey below to fill out. You are in NO WAY obligated to fill it out, but if you do, I will sprinkle you with even more hugs and kisses (and mangoes).
Let me know if the thingy above doesn’t work so I can give you the link! (For some reason, each time I paste in the link, it transforms to that preview thingamajig. #techsavvy)
Feeling like you’ll surely die between today and next Tuesday? Feeling proud of yourselves for making this grumpy mango so happy? Feeling TOTALLY happy at the prospect of filling out a (super long) survey? CHAT WITH ME BEFORE I LEAVE FOREVEEEEEEEEEEER.