May’s Moments of the Month: May // Big Reading Slump, No School, Bad Mental Health… but Pride and Vacation?

So! The month of me (May) was uhhhh not that great.

I mean, what could I expect? After April being my best month, I couldn’t expect May to be just as great, could I. I mean. That would be ridiculous. I would never expect something silly like that.

Okay so thankfully it wasn’t COMPLETELY bad: I got full scores on all my exams, ended the school year with hardly any homework and some fun with friends, and read some good books, despite being in a slump?

This is just me grabbing at positive things let’s be real.

mmm reading

I read 6 books this month. I definitely slumped.

The books I read were all rated pretty highly, though!! It was just that I had NO motivation to read them and just… didn’t care. The only books I actually WANTED to read were the books I reread, but I had to stop myself from finishing my series reread. (Which made me actually tear up. I’m fragile and I miss my favorites.)

Undead Girl Gang  People Like Us  Nice Try, Jane Sinner

The Lightning Thief (Percy Jackson and the Olympians, #1)  The Sea of Monsters (Percy Jackson and the Olympians, #2)  Obsidio (The Illuminae Files, #3)

  • Undead Girl Gang Lily Anderson // loved the female friendship themes + the mystery aspect was very entertaining + hilarious narration voice ★★★★☆
  • People Like Us Dana Mele // the queer girl mystery we all needed + GENUINELY thrilling + loved the atmospheric vibe (murderous boarding school) + just so,, good ★★★★☆
  • Nice Try, Jane Sinner Lianne Oelke // SUCH. GOOD. DEPRESSION. REP. + teared up over how closely it mirrored my experiences + it’s so FUNNY + genuinely loved the characters ★★★★☆ [4.5]
  • The Lightning Thief Rick Riordan // REREAD // I can’t say anything much about this without tearing up but I love this book and this series and these characters SO. MUCH. ★★★★★
  • The Sea of Monsters Rick Riordan // REREAD // I teared up at the end because of how much I loved Percy, Annabeth, Grover, and Tyson if that tells you anything ★★★★★
  • Obsidio Amie Kaufman & Jay Kristoff // boring at first + unrealistic ending + but so enjoyable + I was sweating during the whole book + I BINGED + I love Ella Malikova ★★★★☆

arc haul?

I didn’t get any physical ARCs this month (because I haven’t requested any ARCs since like… April), but I did get two eARCs from Edelweiss! My first!!

Summer Bird Blue  Our Stories, Our Voices: 21 YA Authors Get Real About Injustice, Empowerment, and Growing Up Female in America

I’m SO excited to read these both. Summer Bird Blue is written by the author of one of the most meaningful, personal books (Starfish), and I can’t wait to be blown away by her writing and storytelling. (I’m reading it right now and it’s beautiful already.)

And I’m super excited to read Our Stories, Our Voices, a feminist anthology full of pieces by some of my favorite authors! I’m so so happy to read a feminist anthology that will tackle more than just white women’s struggles and shed some light on what marginalized women have gone through.

favorite book?

Okay I guess this is cheating but The Lightning Thief and The Sea of Monsters because they are my absolute favorites and my everything and my childhood and I literally teared up reading them because I love these characters so much!!!

disappointment?

I guess, Obsidio, kind of? I mean, I actually wasn’t expecting 5 stars, but it would’ve been nice. The book was a nice conclusion and it was SO EXCITING and fun and enjoyable to read… but it was boring at the beginning and was super unrealistic.

favorite review?

Guess who barely wrote any reviews this month!!!!

Anyways, I was depressed and had no motivation to do anything and also busy with exams so I really didn’t write any book reviews. Except for me reviews of books that I haven’t read… like the THIRD SIX OF CROWS BOOK that’s supposed to be coming out several years down the line!! Someone scream with me!!!

mmm blogging

updates?

  • I thought I was going to blog more. But I did not.
  • I thought I was going to comment on more posts. But I did not.
  • I thought I was going to reply to comments. But I did not.
  • A disappointing day for us all am I right??
  • BUT! I did post six times, which was more than I have in the past few months, and I’m very proud of that. And I’m so so happy that my stats have climbed back up, it means the world to me that you all continue to support me as I struggle to come back to blogging like I used to.

top post?

Again, I posted few times (though better than April) so I can’t really pick an accurate “Top Three” but my most popular post BY FAR was my post recommending some books with Asian characters, and talking about a few ownvoices Asian books on my TBR!!

(I was going to write another post with more recs, but unfortunately I ran out of time and motivation.)

Thank you all so so much for your support on this post, it means A LOT to see this much love for a post celebrating my and other marginalized people’s culture!!

favorite post of the month?

I mean, my favorite post was the my most popular one, because duh, celebrating Asians. BUT I also really really enjoyed writing this discussion post! It’s something close to my heart and something I’ve been thinking about for a long time. And as always, everyone’s comments are so meaningful and relevant.

posts i loved?

Like I said, I SUCKED at reading and commenting on posts this month… so I don’t have a lot!

mmm writing

  • Y’all I’m close to breaking down just thinking about this???
  • (Okay, not right now. But I will later, probably.)
  • I didn’t do ANYTHING writing-wise this month!!! And I hate myself for it!!!!
  • I’ve decided, against all the people who voted otherwise in my poll for my April recap, that I’m just going to take my old horrible cringy WIP, form a slightly better plot for it, and use the first 9K of it that I wrote. Because there is NO way that I can plot and write 9K in a month in time to hit the deadline of the writing contest that I want to enter!
  • Wish me luck. Can’t wait to wait till the week before the deadline to do everything.

mmm life

  • So! My depression disappeared at the end of April, and stayed far away at the beginning of May.
  • But then it came back!! In full force!!!
  • And if you remember me screaming about my mental health in March, you’ll remember that I had breakdowns over Spring Break, because there was nothing to distract me (aka school).
  • I got out of school last week, and the same thing is already beginning to happen!!!
  • I haven’t had any actual breakdowns yet, but I definitely have been feeling/thinking the same things that I felt/thought during Spring Break. However, this time I’m more focused on fighting it and there are a few things I know that will help me out so I feel less affected at the moment!
  • Anyways, besides mental health things, I’m OUT OF SCHOOL. I feel so happy and free and relaxed and I LOVE IT. I also got perfect scores on my exams and I’m just,,,, AAAAHHHHH.
  • Dance recitals happened and it made me so nostalgic. I had an anxiety attack because I’d forgotten one of my costume pieces at home but it turned out just fine and I had a really great time!! AND I HAD A COOKIE.

mmm old goals

I’m laughing hysterically over what happened this month.

READING

  • read at least 8 books  (no)
  • write & upload at least 5 reviews  (oh my god)
  • request more ARCs  (yikes)

WRITING

  • plot and write 9K of my current WIP  (no)
  • OR re-plot and revise my old WIP  (no)
  • and also… get back into poetry??  (no)

BLOGGING

  • post at least 7 times!  (I WAS SO CLOSE)
  • reply to recent comments & comment back!!  (hahhahahhaha great job May!!!!!)
  • comment on at least 4 posts a day  (doing amazing)

LIFE

  • drink 1 water bottle each day  (achieving all your goals omg)
  • SEEEEELF-CAAAAARE  (wow so good sweetie!!)
  • get 8 hours of sleep at least three times a week  (THE ONLY GOAL I ACCOMPLISHED WOW)

mmm new goals

READING

  • read at least 8 books (I have 8 books on my TBR for Pride Month and I really want to read them all!!)
  • write & upload at least 5 reviews (okay. I’ve been in a review-writing mood lately so I think this is manageable)
  • request more ARCs (PLEASE I want free books)

WRITING

  • not get anxious over writing workshop (so not a WRITING-specific goal but I have a workshop for two weeks and I just don’t want to panic)
  • re-plot and revise my old WIP (I HAVE to get this one done because the writing contest deadline is July 1!!)
  • and also… get back into poetry?? (please?)

BLOGGING

  • post at least 7 times! (I GOT THIS)
  • reply to recent comments & comment back!! (summer time = free time = time to blog!!)
  • comment on at least 4 posts a day (I will do this. I can do this)

LIFE

  • drink 1 water bottle each day (it hit the 90s mid-May and I definitely need to stay Hydrated)
  • stretch! (I only have summer dance classes to keep me in shape so I need to make sure to stretch)
  • get 8 hours of sleep at least three times a week (meaning: go to sleep at 1am, wake up at 9am)

mmm looking ahead

Lots of writing things! I’m doing a writing workshop/class/camp for the first two weeks of June, which I’ve been doing for a few years, and I’m both nervous and excited. I’m also editing a short story for an anthology I’m submitting to, as well as plotting and editing something to enter for a writing contest!

Dance is back!! We have Company auditions (tomorrow) and summer classes and dance intensives and I’m EXCITED. There’s nothing particularly intense (except for the… intensives) but dance really makes me relax and loosen my body after getting so stressed over stupid things.

IT’S PRIDE MONTH!!! I don’t think I’ve ever EXPLICITLY came out and said that I was queer but, uh, hi? I’m bi, greyromantic, and demisexual! And I’m using she/they pronouns from now on. 😊 I’m super excited for Pride Month, especially since I’m reading all-queer books, but I just love this atmosphere of happiness and celebration that comes during this month!


shall we chat

HOW WAS YOUR MAY??? was it amayzing?? (i’m not sorry) if you’re a part of the lgbtqiap+ community, how are you celebrating pride month? are you out of school yet? is it getting insufferably hot for you? are you doing a lot of cool writing things?? HOW ARE YOU

blog signoff

 

33 thoughts on “May’s Moments of the Month: May // Big Reading Slump, No School, Bad Mental Health… but Pride and Vacation?

  1. OMG AMAZING READS!! I NEEED NICE TRY JANE SINNER, I’m so glad that you enjoyed it!! And People Like Us sounds FABULOUS AND I WANT IT IN MY CLAMMY HANDS ASAP.

    OBSIDIO!!!! OMG!!! OMG!!! OBSIDIO!!!!!!!!
    NGKJRDBRHJRDHRDBDRJRNGJ ELLLLLAAAAAA. IM SO SAD THAT IT WAS KIND OF A DISAPPOINTMENT FOR YOUR!! My soul is weeping softly.

    Gjrnhgjernglkehiernhjrenh THE THIRD SOC BOOKS.
    WE’RE SCREAMING FOREVER, OK?

    There’s no pressure for you to produce content (even tho there seems like a tonne!!) and you just go at your own rate. if you don’t feel like blogging, don’t! If you don’t feel like responding to comments, don’t! We’re still gonna be here when you DO feel like commenting/producing content!

    Dngkjsngjrsg thank you for mentioning my post!! You’re so sweet!!! Waaaaaaaaaaa ❤ ❤

    I’m so sorry to hear that your mental health has been so horrible recently, and I hope that you feel better soon, GET LOTS OF REST MAYYYY ❤ ❤ EAT ALL THE COOKIES, READ ALL THE BOOKS!!

    I’m so hyped for pride month??? I’m??? Dying??? Tho I was full on going to come out the other night and then my mum went and did the “accidentally”-homophobic thing and grbgkrdfngh. WHICH BOOKS ARE YOU READING FOR PRIDE???????? KILL MY TBR? PLEASE?

    Great wrap up!! Ily!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Jane Sinner was really funny and represented depression SO WELL. People Like Us is literally my dark side?? I love it so much. And DKSKFKDJ I wasn’t expecting Obsidio to be 5 stars BUT I WISH IT WAS

      Aaahhh thank you so much!!! I’m really motivated to produce content but not motivated to like, interact with people? Which sucks because I love this community, but interacting drains a lot out of me when I’m already drained :/ BUT THANK YOU FOR THE WELL WISHES. 💓💓💓

      Oh noooo, I’m so sorry! I’m blessed to not have homophobic parents (just gotta get over the huge ball of anxiety and panic to come out) so I can’t relate to you, but I am so so sorry. If there’s anything I can do, let me know 💞

      (PRIDE TBR POST IS GOING UP TODAY!)

      Like

  2. PERCABETH AND ALL THE CHARACTERS MAKE ME CRY TOO
    Omg, CONGRATS on getting perfect scores on your exams!!!! I’m so proud of you 💞 and, it wasn’t a secret, but congrats on your coming out, ILY 💗🌈🌼
    I’m celebrating pride month by practicing self care and reading queer books (I mean, that’s really nothing new!). Also I plan to wear my new socks with rainbows and unicorns a lot (at least when I’m not at work lmao). I also might do something on my blog but I haven’t had time to organize anything so we’ll see!
    I hope your day is going great, and I wish you an AMAZING pride month! 🌈🌈🌈

    Liked by 2 people

    1. PERCABETH MAKES ME SOB I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭😭

      Fjkskfkdksjfj thank you so much Sil you’re the best LOVE YOU TOO 💕💕

      And HELL YEAH for rainbow unicorn socks!!! You should… take selfies of yourself with them… and send them to me….. HAVE A GREAT PRIDE MONTH TOO ANGEL 💓🌈

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I love this post and you and hope your June is filled with nothing but happiness, unconditional love, healthiness, and GOOD BOOKS, BABES! Also, forever and ever proud of you! And I can’t wait for our buddy reads this month! ❤ xx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Okay but how is everything ?? on your blog ?? so stunning ?? I love it! ❤ Congratulations on your exam results, I can only hope that I do as well as you did. I really hope your mental health gets better, currently sending you hugs! Hopefully you'll have a great June 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. This was a really good post! My May was rubbish. I slumped in everything and spent the whole month totally tired and in the deep dark hole of depression with anxiety attacks spotted here and there and very little food beige consumed thanks to my anorexia. So it was fun!
    Huge ups to you for coming out! I’m bi/pansexual (still trying to work it out) and demisexual and me and my other lgbtq community friends are having a huge party with rainbow cake.
    ~Emily xo ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Aw, I’m so sorry about your May! That really sucks. I can’t say I know what having anorexia is like, but I’ve been there with depression and anxiety and it sucks. I hope you feel better soon and if you ever need to talk, I’m always here to listen! ❤

      Thank you so much!! And aahhh the bi/pan thing was a bit of a struggle for me as well (lmk if you want to talk about it at all), I hope you figure it out!! HAVE FUN AT THE PARTY IT SOUNDS AWESOME!!!

      Like

  6. YEAH JUST DROP THAT COMING OUT CASUALLY IM SO PROUD OF U BBY!!! ❤ ❤ Happy Pride!! I'm so sad about your slump, I'm still in a kinda slump but not really!? It's weird. At the beginning of the month, i was in a huge slump and I had a slump in April too. AHHH OMG SUMMER BIRD BLUE. I've ALWAYS got declined on Edelweiss (i cannot spell) and never ACCEPTED and everyone else is just accepted for everything :((( LET ME KNOW IF SBB I GOING PLEASE. it looks SO good!!! I hate that ur depression and bad mental health has returned, it makes me so sad because you just deserve all the happiness?!?! If you EVER need to talk, I'm always here ❤ ❤ and please do get back into poetry. i find it really helps me just in general when im feeling angry or sad so that's good!! also ur poetry is SOOOOO beautiful pls share it with me. have fun at the writing workshop, that sounds SO cool!! hopefully u don't get too anxious about it and enjoy yourself! yikes, THOSE GOALS YOU ONLY COMPLETED ONE HAHA. Hopefully, next month is better?? YOUR SO LUCKY SCHOOL IS OVER. I STILL HAVE SIX WEEKS UNTIL MY SUMMER HOLS SFDHFHDFJ. I really wanna read Nice Try Jane Sinner IVE ONLY HEARD GOOD THINGS SO I THINK IT WILL BE PERFECT FOR ME AHH. love you so much, hope you complete all your goals in June, and have fun dancing and just being you ❤ okay, i'm done being sappy byeee.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I figured if I dropped it casually then people would take it casually ya know?? (and also homophobes might not see some huge post title like COMING OUT and then unfollow me)

      slumping is the WORST but I’m actually slumping a little less now??? I’m a little shaken. and Summer Bird Blue 😉 huh 😉

      FSJDLFKSD I LOVE U!!! I’m very sad about my depression returning because I definitely deserve all the happiness but,,, I’ll make it through ❤ and fjlskjfd it was actually the poems that you shared last month that made me want to get back into it!! I feel like I've lost my ability to make words magical though fjlsdfjsd

      oooohh I feel like you wouldn't like Jane Sinner (I think it appeals to a specific audience, especially humor-wise?) but IF YOU READ IT I HOPE YOU LIKE IT ❤

      Like

  7. AHHHH YOU ARE SO SWEET FOR MENTIONING ME I LOVE YOU ❤️❤️

    Also, I’m so, so proud of you for coming out, you’re a true Icon, and I feel so blessed to have you as my friend?? You’re such an amazing human being, and I hope depression and anxiety shut up and leave you alone this month (or as alone as is possible). I hope you have the best time writing & dancing (and I want a video of you dancing??) KIK ME.

    TO SUMMARIZE: I LOVE YOU, YOU’RE DOING GREAT, PLEASE HAVE THE MOST FANTASTIC MONTH.

    Like

  8. The depression! 😭 Time to cue High School Musical: We’re all in this together ♬
    Yeah my stats are personally going down so that’s sad. But I’m looking forward to being out of grade 9 this month! Just a *few* more weeks left. 😂

    Like

  9. I loved this post. It was so busy and all over the place and just so like the inside of my mind sometimes! I think you’re doing a great job jumping back into blogging more. I appreciate your list of posts for the month, I will be making my way through them later today.

    And about the reading, I totally feel you on just wanting to reread. I think there’s no shame in that! In fact, I think it’s good for preventing reading slumps. It’s self-care. I think after June I’m just going to start rereading all my all-time favorites. I think it’ll help a lot with my own writing.

    If you’re worried about what you’ll post when you reread, I recommend updating your reviews or writing blog posts that allow you to show your new perspectives on older books. That way, you won’t feel like you’re being unproductive. ^_^

    Like

  10. Rereading can be so great and relaxing. Been kind of wanting to reread lately, but then I feel guilty because my TBR is a mile high =( And I just finished all the Percy Jackson books but I kind of just want to read them all over again? Just miss me some Percy humor.
    And anxiety is just evil. But at least school is out? And Dance sounds fun? I really wish I could dance but I just never got into it/ And I don’t know if I’ll ever start in an adult studio or something like that.
    I just tried out Edelweiss, and got approved for 2 arcs that I really wanted? I was SO SURPRISED!

    Like

  11. Ohhh I’m sorry May wasn’t a great month for you, but congratulations on getting good scores on your exams! And you’re so lucky to be on summer holidays already 😀 I can’t wait to be free of revising and have enough time to really work on my WIP… oh well, only a couple more weeks to go… 😛

    I really want to read Percy Jackson now lol, I’ve only read the first book around three years ago and I loved it, but for some reason I never read the rest?? Idk. They keep getting pushed down on my TBR list for some reason, I really want to read them tho…

    Happy Pride Month, I hope June is amazing for you!! 🙂

    Like

  12. Oh I’m sorry May was such a bad month for you, but hopefully your June will be much much better. 🙂 ❤
    I think you got through some great books though, and they were all rated quite highly by you so that means you must have enjoyed them somewhat too. It's a shame about Obsidio, but the fact that it got four stars from you is still something right? I guess that it was the last in the trilogy and so highly hyped it can't live up to all our expectations can it? 🙂
    Good luck with all your goals for June, it seems like you have a lot going on and a lot to be excited for too. 🙂
    Great recap, and I hope you have a brilliant June. ❤

    Like

  13. I hope June goes much better for you May!💞But yay for dance recitals and COOKIES and getting arcs and everything else, too. Happy summer, and I hope the writing workshop you’re going to is as fun as it sounds!

    Like

  14. I think you mentioned your queerness before or I just assumed?? lol maybe my gaydar went off. anyway, CONGRATS! I’ve been thinking that i’m demi lately but not 100% sure and don’t care about labels at this stage of my life yet. AND OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING MY POST!! i was legit wondering why i suddenly got new followers out of nowhere and then i noticed you mentioning my post xD pls drink more water may! especially because you live in texas and it’s getting into the hot summer months!! i’ll ship bottles of water to your house if i need to

    Like

  15. May I’m so sorry to hear about your depression, sending you lots of love and hugs ❤❤❤ I hope June will be a lot better for you and that you’ll be able to enjoy your freedom and Pride without your mental health getting in the way ❤❤❤

    Also don’t worry about not being able to post/comment we’ll all stick around and keep loving you and your blog ❤❤❤ Don’t pressure yourself too much ok!! We’re not going anywhere ❤❤❤

    Like

  16. I really hope that June is already better for you, I’m sorry that May wasn’t the best month :/
    I’m glad to hear you read Jane Sinner and enjoyed it, this book is on my TBR and I can’t WAIT to get around to reading it, it sounds incredible and everyone I know has praised this book, so I can’t wait 😀
    I hope you’ll enjoy your time off school – summertime and holidays is such an amazing time, take your time to relax and take care of yourself and don’t worry about blogging too much, you are doing AMAZING ❤ ❤ Sending you all the love! ❤ ❤

    Like

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