9 Lies Bookworms Will Tell You (Because We’re Evil and Find Enjoyment in Manipulating You… Oops)

Bookworms are generally known to be lying, manipulative monsters.

And if you didn’t know it before, THANK ME. Now you can protect yourself from them. Or at least attempt to.

But seriously??? BOOKWORMS TELL SO MANY LIES. This is why no one trusts them. We just lie ALL. THE. TIME. and people get fed up with us. We get fed up with ourselves, tbh. Sometimes I make myself go sit in a corner and think about what I’ve done. (With a book, of course.)

Because I’m the kindest soul on the face of the earth, I’ll be revealing some lies that you’ll hear from ALL bookworms. Unless??? Some bookworms are telling the truth???

But HAHAHAHAHAH highly lowkey impossible.

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9 Things “Regular People” Should Never Say to a Bookworm (Unless You Have an Extreme Death Wish)

There are MANY things that offend bookworms.

Some of these include: 1) insulting their fandom/favorite book, 2) interrupting their reading, and 3) not giving them your money when they demand politely ask for it omggg how ruder can you get.

But not only can your ACTIONS offend bookworms and/or make them cry, but also your words. And because bookworms are very fragile creatures who will easily break, I’ve compiled a list of 9 things you should NEVER say to a bookworm.

Unless you want to die, of course. In that case, go on ahead and tell every bookworm you know the following phrases! You most definitely WILL NOT get a pineapple thrown at your head???

Seriously tho, you don’t want a pineapple thrown at your head—LOOK AT HOW SPIKY THEY ARE.

But pineapples are also quite aesthetic and come on you LIVE for the aesthetics…

NOTE: I’m a bit salty in this post so beware of that. :))

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Exactly How I Manage to Be A Supremely Amazing Blogger™ (The Revealing of All of My Secrets???)

You have to admit, I’m a pretty good blogger.

And by pretty good, I mean great. And by great, I mean amazing.

I’M JUST KIDDINGGGGGG. I actually am really shy about my “blogging success” (see the quotation marks). But a lot of you guys have told me that I’m an “amazing” blogger and that I’m a favorite of yours and IT MAKES ME SQUEAL OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!

But when the sweetest-ever, kindest-ever, amazing-est-ever Marie @ Drizzle and Hurricane Books forcefully said suggested that I write a post on how I was an “amazing” blogger, I was a little mixed:

1) OMG SHE CALLED ME AMAZING AWW STOP BEING SO SWEEEEEEET AD;FLJASLD;FJASD, and 2) telling all my secrets??? me??? no??? HOW COULD I.

But apparently I could and I can because here I am. (I can RHYME.)

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9 Reasons Why You Should Never Ever Trust a Writer/Author (They’ll Actually Kill You) Ft. Emotional Pain

Writers are SCARY PEOPLE.

They can do many things to you, ranging from making you feel extreme emotions to also killing you.

AND THEY ACTUALLY ENJOY IT.

jal;ksdjfLJ;LFKJAL;SDJFlkjaf;lajkdsf They are evil and cruel and horrible and ghastly and yet we still love them.

But! MANY negative things happen to you that are caused by writers/authors, so that’s why I decided to make a list on why you should never trust writers. And also because I did a similar post with bookworms and it was much fun.

Note: This list consists of pain, pain, and pain, so if you don’t want to read the whole thing, THERE YOU GO! You have a one-word summary: PAIN.

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How to Deal With Bookish Disappointments (Without Intense Sobbing—or Death! Wow!)

I am not easily disappointed.

Especially by books! I’m actually really really nice when I rate books*, so I’m always expecting to NEVER be disappointed. (Why read a book you think will disappoint you???) And for 98.3%, I’m not!!!

But the other 1.7% or something**, I DO get disappointed. And because that’s such a rare feeling for me, I don’t know how to deal with it???

LUCKILY FOR YOU, I’ve put together a little guide about how to deal with bookish disappointments, because if you’re like me, you probably just end up sobbing and/or dying from disappointment.

HENCE WHY THIS GUIDE WILL NOT INCLUDE SOBBING OR DYING.

*Which is why I have never rated a book one star… Strangle me.
**I hate math.

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